Promposals: preposterous


Ryan Abbott


Now that prom season is here, we’re into what I call awkhellantic season (awkward+hell+panic season.) The giant signs and awkward ways of asking girls have started. Some guys hit a homerun, while others groundout.

It seems like guys panic trying to find a date and figuring out how to ask, an overall hell, while women sit back, relax, eat popcorn and wait for someone to come to them.

Do guys go through all of this trouble because they want to or because they feel pressured? Some think girls’ expectations are so high, that men feel obligated to do it in a big way, and, if they don’t, then the girl won’t be impressed. Some agree with this and others feel the complete opposite. Rachel Neu (12), said, “Some girls expect so much out of guys, it makes me nauseous.”

This idea of asking girls in ways such as filling a locker with ping pong balls that say, “prom,” or asking, in a fish tank, gives all woman exactly what they wanted: attention. Girls love attention.Women just want to feel special, and guys certainly attempt to make them feel that way during the season.

Wedding proposals can be as romantic and over-the-top as possible because marriage is a big step. Flash mob wedding proposals are perfectly acceptable. But we’re talking about prom; 17 and 18 year-olds asking people in such big ways for just one night. I’m not sure why they would want to cross the acceptable barrier, maybe they want to release their inner Austin Powers.

Some guys waste so much energy just to get a date. If you haven’t noticed, prom season is the time of the year for the highest number of couples and the highest number of break ups. This is known as make-out break-out syndrome.

Whatever happened to the good ol’ fashion way of asking a girl to prom: Hey you want to go to prom? All of these new tacky ways of asking girls to prom just entice prom-dram. Are boyfriends supposed to ask their girlfriends to prom? Probably, I’m guessing that’s an expectation, too. I thought it was supposed to just be inferred that couples were already going together, but I guess not. How could it be inferred with the expectations of women these days? Shouldn’t that be a benefit of having a relationship? So there’s none of this drama.

The senselessness needs to end. Kemp Ensor (12) said, “Women’s power needs to be halted in its tracks, what happened to the good ol’ days? The days prior to 1920, when women and honey badgers had the same amount of justification in this world.” If a girl doesn’t accept a simple request, she isn’t worth bringing.

Ultimately, guys are giving all of the power they are supposed to have to women. I don’t want anyone to think I’m against women dressing up beautifully and even shaving the facial hair they are usually too lazy to get rid of for this night. I just believe it should be a little more old-fashioned; walk up to a girl with a rose, and say, “Will you let me release my inner Austin Powers on you?”